LEARNING TO WAIT AND DO WITHOUT=+
Does your life-style show your children that their=+
wants and desires are not to control them?=+
by=+
Wendell E. Miller=++

Q.  I am disturbed that Christians are buying things on credit
rather than waiting until they can afford them. Does the Bible
say anything about credit financing? =++

A.  The Scriptures command that we "owe no man anything, but
to love one another" (Rom. 13:8). On the basis of this verse,
some say that the Scriptures prohibit borrowing. =++

However, lending is taught in the Scriptures (Ex. 22:25; 13:8;
Matt. 5:42). If borrowing is condemned in Romans 13:8, then it
would seem that lending, which is taught in the Scriptures,
would encourage others to sin by borrowing. Therefore, "owe no
man anything" cannot be a prohibition against borrowing. =++

"Owe no man anything" can be understood by considering the
verb tense of the Greek text. More accurately, this verse
reads, "continue owing no man anything." =++

That is, do not fail to meet obligations to anyone, whether
these obligations are financial or in showing honor (Rom.
13:5-7). However, verse 8 also teaches that the debt of loving
one another is never discharged completely. Loving one another
is to be continued. =++

One way to look at borrowing is to consider the root reason
for borrowing. Of course, one basic reason for borrowing is
covetousness.  =++

Some parents subject themselves and their children to an
almost constant barrage of advertisers on television whose job
is to convince viewers that they need a certain article, that
they deserve to have it, and that they must have it--now. =++

Providing reasonable housing through a home mortgage loan is
different than purchasing items that wear out, rust out or
become obsolete almost as soon as the last monthly payment is
made.=++

Also, purchasing a home by time payments is much different
than living from hand-to-mouth by charging for perishable or
consumable items each month and then paying interest charges
for plastic (credit card) purchases. =++

A large percentage of Christians purchase a home on time
payments and end up owning the property, even though they have
paid dearly in interest through the years. =++

But buying a home on payments is generally better than paying
rent; and a home mortgage may be a hedge against inflation.
=++

It is disturbing to see that lending institutions are
encouraging indiscriminate borrowing on home equities. The
idea seems to be: arrange a credit line that is the maximum
that you could borrow on your home equity and "write a check"
for whatever your heart desires (never think that you will
have to pay it back together with interest, and never consider
that you may lose your home). =++

Encouraging anyone to buy anything that is not for his good is
not fulfilling the commandment to love one another. =++

Most interest charges (other than for a home mortgage) could
be prevented if the parents would: 1) be willing to drive an
older car; 2) do without many of the things that the world
wants to sell them; 3) refrain from impulse buying; 4) do as
many of their own house and car repairs as possible; 5) use
fewer "prepared" foods; 6) refrain from eating out frequently;
7) train their children "to be able to live" without designer
clothing and 8) purchase some items at garage sales. =++

The answer to many interest charges lies in "doing without."
Many people are in financial trouble because they have not
learned to deny themselves anything. =++

Solomon learned by experience that things will not buy
satisfaction in life. He said, "And whatsoever mine eyes
desired I kept not from them, I withheld not my heart from any
joy . . . and, behold, all was vanity and vexation of spirit"
(Eccles. 2:10,11). =++

Verse 11 might be paraphrased to read, "And everything was as
meaningless as vapor that appears for a moment and then
vanishes, and everything was like chasing the wind and not
being able to lay hold on anything." There was no satisfaction
in having "things." =++

Since there is no real satisfaction in having "things,"
Christians need to learn to find their satisfaction in
pleasing God and in serving others, to His glory (Col.
3:23,24; Acts 20:35). (See "How Can I Teach Contentment?" and
"Is `Self-Love' the Answer?" and "How Do You See Yourself?" in the Q&A Counseling Articles index.=++

If finances are managed to the glory of God, then there will
be a priority on Christian giving, and there should be money
to help others. Remember, one of the basic reasons for working
is to be able to help others (Eph. 4:28). =++

Christian parents, other adult Christians and churches need to
model "doing without" to children and youth. Further, parents
(together with grandparents) need to show real wisdom and
restraint and not try (vainly) to show love by giving lavish
or inappropriate gifts. =++

Then parents are in a good position to insist that their
children and youth do without things that are contrary to good
stewardship. =++

Another basic root of the problem of inappropriate spending is
that many have never learned to "wait." If a person can "wait"
to buy something, then he can "wait" a little longer; and if
he can "wait" a little longer, he can either "wait" until he
can afford it, or he can do without it. =++

Children "cannot" wait for an anticipated event, and youth
"cannot" wait to grow up. They believe that they will never
get old enough to do anything. =++

Sometimes, it appears that the parents cannot wait either.
Some parents seem to be pushing their children into adulthood
and into adulthood experiences. Sadly, without realizing it,
they may be robbing their children of their childhood, the
opportunity of learning to "wait" and future contentment. =++

The Scriptures tell a remarkable story of "waiting." When
Jesus was 12 years old, He went to Jerusalem with His parents
to observe the Passover. Mary and Joseph went a day's journey
back to Nazareth, supposing that Jesus was with some of their
relatives. =++

Then, after a hurried journey back to Jerusalem and three
frantic days searching the city,"they found Him in the temple,
sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and
asking them questions" (Luke 2:41-47). =++

His sinless mind had absorbed the Scriptures like a sponge
taking up water. His knowledge of the Bible was far beyond His
years, and both His knowledge and wisdom astonished the most
learned Bible scholars (v. 47). =++

Mary said to Jesus, "Why have you done this to us? Your father
and I have been looking for you sorrowing" (v. 48). =++

Jesus, in all sincerity, replied, "Didn't you know that I must
be about My Father's business?" (v. 49). His understanding of
the Scriptures was far beyond His years. Did He think that it
was time for Him to start His ministry? =++

Yet with all of His understanding of the Scriptures, He was
not ready to start His ministry at the age of 12. His ministry
was to be the most difficult ministry ever accomplished--the
ministry that would change, for eternity, all who would
believe in Him and His substitutionary death on the cross. =++

Apparently, Mary and Joseph told Jesus to go home with them,
and in His sinless obedience, He said, "Yes, mother; yes,
father"; and He went with them without complaint.  =++

The Scriptures are silent on the years of Jesus' "waiting" to
start His ministry, except for the fact that He "increased in
wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man" (v. 52).
=++

It is assumed that He learned the carpenter trade from Joseph,
working by the sweat of His brow (Matt. 13:55). He who had
created all things and who had held the atoms together by His
own power, was forming objects of wood with crude tools while
He waited to begin His ministry (John 1:1-3; Col. 1:17). =++

He waited, and He waited, and He waited--until He was 30 years
old. Eighteen years was a long time to wait for a young man
whose mind and knowledge of the Scriptures at the age of 12
was already equal to, or superior to, the most learned men.
=++

Learning to wait should start in childhood. A baby demands
immediate gratification, small children find it difficult to
wait for anything, youth want it now. =++

One way to help children learn to wait is to be sure that
everyone waits at the table until everyone is served. This is
only courtesy, and it is not likely that anyone will starve.
Children of five years of age should sit with their hands
folded in their laps, waiting for the host or hostess to take
the first bite, even though ice cream and cake have been
placed in front of them. =++

If parents, grandparents and others can wait, and if they will
wait, children can learn to wait. They can learn to wait for
the first bite of ice cream, and they can wait until the
appropriate time for each event in life.  =++

If they are not taught to wait, it is not likely that they
will "be able" to wait until they can afford to buy "things."
It is not likely that they will "be able" to wait until
marriage for sexual relations. Instead, it is likely that
their wants and desires will control them--simply because they
have not learned to "wait." =++

The answers to problems with Christians' finances? Learn to
get satisfaction from pleasing God, rather than vainly
attempting to find satisfaction in "things." Learn to serve
others and find the happiness that comes from giving rather
than receiving (Acts 20:35). Learn to "wait." Learn to "do
without." =++

Copyright 1988 by Wendell E. Miller=+
Downloaded from http://www.biblical-counsel.org=++

May be reprinted and distributed in quantities if distributed
free or at cost, and if=+
copyright, download, and permission information is included.=+
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