TRUE LOVE DEALS WITH PROBLEMS =+
Does your local church practice biblical discipline?=+
Or does it just "wish problems away"? =+
by=+
Wendell E. Miller =++

Q. I am a Christian, but I fell into sin. A Christian
organization accepted me as I was and also gave me a position
as an assistant director. How can you advocate church
discipline for someone like me? I needed acceptance, not
rejection. =++

A. Much is being said today about "acceptance," so there is a
need to find biblical scope on the subject. =++

The world teaches that no one should criticize the "moral
choices" of others; rather, everyone is entitled to
"unconditional acceptance," without regard to his/her
"life-style." =++

It is clear that sinful behavior should not be acceptable to
Christians. However, the problem for Christians is determining
how to deal with those whose behavior is sinful. =++

Some Christians are seeking to separate the sin from the
sinner, rejecting the sin but accepting the sinner. They see
showing an "unconditional acceptance" of the sinner as being
a Christlike love. =++

Some use the term "unconditional love" to refer to this
"unconditional acceptance" of others.=++

Some Christians say that God "accepted us" and showed us
unconditional love while we were yet sinners. =++

It is true that God loved us and gave His Son for us while we
were yet sinners (Rom. 5:8), but He could not accept us.
Instead, without the death of His Son on the cross, He had no
other choice but to banish us from His presence forever (Rom.
6:23). His love in giving His Son was unconditional, but His
acceptance was, and is, conditional upon sinners accepting His
Son as their Savior (John 3:36). =++

So, "unconditional love" and "unconditional acceptance" are
separate and distinct concepts. =++

Did this Christian organization that "accepted" you, love you
enough to help you get back into fellowship with God? Or did
they merely accept you, and in "accepting" you deprive you of
the blessing of being restored to fellowship with God? =++

Did this Christian organization that "accepted" you, love you
enough to insist that you return to your local church and get
back into fellowship there? Or did they merely accept you, and
in "accepting" you deprive you of the joy of being restored to
fellowship with your local church? =++

Biblical church discipline is love that attacks a problem,
rather than wishing that the problem, or the person, would go
away. It is love that attempts to restore the sinning
believer, loving him too much to ignore the problem, and
loving him too much to wish merely that he would quit
attending "our" church and take his problems elsewhere. =++

Church discipline shows love for Christ.  Jesus said, "If ye
love me, keep my commandments" (14:15). Loving God includes
following biblical teaching on church discipline. =++

Church discipline is love in action. It seeks to magnify
Christ and His church, rather than allowing Him to be
blasphemed and the church to be ridiculed through acts of
unrepentant believers who have not been subjected to church
discipline. =++

Thus, church discipline, if performed biblically, is an
expression of "unconditional love" for Christ and for the
sinning believer. This "unconditional love" is shown by taking
steps with goals of bringing glory to God, and bringing
sinning Christians back into fellowship with God and with
their local churches, if at all possible. =++

If the sinning Christian will not repent, then after giving
him ample opportunity, and with great regret, "unconditional
love" for him, "unconditional love" for Christ, and obedience
to biblical teaching, requires that the unrepentant sinner not
be "accepted unconditionally." =++

Instead, the Scriptures teach a step in church discipline in
which: 1) the sinning Christian is identified to the
congregation as a whole, 2) members of the congregation are to
admonish him, 3) he is not allowed to take communion, and 4)
other Christians are not to eat with him or fellowship with
him (1 Cor. 5:11; 2 Thess. 3:6,14,15). =++

The steps of church discipline are gentle initially, but
become more firm as time goes on if there is no positive
response. =++

If all other attempts fail, biblical church discipline results
in the unrepentant sinner's being considered as an unbeliever,
being taken off the membership roles, and being turned over to
Satan for the destruction of the flesh with the goal that his
spirit will yet be protected in the day of the Lord  (1 Cor.
5:5). =++

Biblical church discipline restricts the knowledge of the
offense to the smallest number possible, in accordance with
the principles of Matthew 18 (vv. 15-17). The circle of
knowledge should be limited to those who are: 1) a part of the
problem, 2) a part of the solution to the problem, and 3)
affected by the problem. =++

Limiting the circle of knowledge to these three categories
precludes gossiping, and may preclude disclosing the problem
to others for good purposes--even prayer. Remember, "the
effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man [singular]
availeth much" (James 5:16). =++

The pastor, or someone else, should first go alone and attempt
to restore the sinning Christian to fellowship with God (and
with other believers, if such is needed). If this first step
fails, then he should take one or two others with him. If
these are not successful, then he should take the problem to
the official board and attempt to bring the sinning Christian
to repentance, without the necessity of taking the matter to
the congregation as a whole. =++

However, if the sin is known to the entire congregation, or if
it will become known to the entire congregation, then the
matter must be settled before the entire congregation. =++

If the sin has caused the name of Christ to be blasphemed,
then the church must be ready and willing to tell any
unbelievers who mock Christianity: 1) that Jesus died for
sinners, 2) that every Christian's life falls far short of
God's perfect holiness and His requirements for entry into
heaven, 3) that no believer would get to heaven if it were not
for the intercession of Jesus for his sins, and 4) that Jesus
has paid for all of the sins of everyone, including the
unbeliever who is criticizing Christianity. =++

The church must be ready to tell any unbeliever that the
sinning Christian has repented and has been restored to
fellowship with God and with the congregation, or that the
person has been disciplined by the church and that the church
is even yet praying for him, whichever is the case. =++

So, church discipline can be an opportunity, not only to
restore a sinning Christian to fellowship with God and to
purify the church, but also an opportunity to answer those who
mock Christianity, and an opportunity to tell of God's love
and the gift of His Son for sinners. =++

Restoration to fellowship with the local church includes
receiving forgiveness from the members of the congregation.
=++

Generally, forgiving another includes acting as if the offense
has been forgotten. However, there are exceptions to this
principle. =++

For the church to act as if the offense has been forgotten,
rather than requiring biblical counseling when such is needed,
would not be showing love for the repentant believer who has
been forgiven and restored to fellowship. =++

For the church to act as if the offense had been forgotten
when restitution needs to be made, would not be showing love
for the repentant believer who has been forgiven and restored
to fellowship. =++

It would be foolish to reinstate a forgiven believer to a
position of trust that he has violated, especially if a child
has been harmed, without first providing a time period in
which the forgiven and restored believer can prove himself
trustworthy. Also, reinstating him prematurely might provide
such a temptation to fall again that it would constitute
putting a stumbling block in his path. =++

Further, forgiveness and restoration to fellowship are not the
same as being biblically qualified for a position of service,
leadership or trust in the local church. =++

The Scriptures teach that even those who serve tables in the
church are to have a good reputation (Acts 6:1-3). This means
that the church cannot act as if it has forgotten the restored
believer's offense when filling any position of service in
which the person appears to be officially representing the
church. =++

The Christian organization that accepted you, believed that
you would make a faithful worker, and they gave you an
opportunity to prove yourself. Superficially this sounds good.
However, from reading your letter, their action appears to
have been contrary to biblical teaching. =++

Instead of giving you a position of leadership, that Christian
organization should have directed you to a place, preferably
your local church, that would have 1) helped you to be
restored to fellowship with God and with fellow believers
(church discipline), 2) provided biblical counseling to help
you to solve problems in your life and to look to God, rather
than man, for "acceptance," 3) provided a discipleship
training program to help you to grow in your Christian life,
and 4) encouraged you to become biblically eligible for
Christian service in the future. =++

Do you see that church discipline is love in action, working
to help those who are not succeeding in their Christian
walk?=++

Does your church show "unconditional love" for sinning members
by utilizing church discipline as a means of restoring them to
fellowship with God, and as a means of helping them succeed in
their Christian walk? =++

If not, first make a careful study of the principles of church
discipline. Then study Church Discipline and the Courts by
Buzzard and Brandon (Tyndale House) so that you can practice
church discipline "decently and in order" (1 Cor. 14:40). =++

When the membership understands church discipline as a way to
show "unconditional love" for straying members, and has a plan
for practicing church discipline "decently and in order," you
are ready to love God, and to love sinning believers, by
practicing church discipline. =++

Church discipline is biblical, necessary, and one way of
showing love. =++

Another way of showing love is helping believers to be
successful in their Christian walk and thus avoiding problems
that require church discipline. Too often, new believers start
their Christian life with joy and enthusiasm, and later
encounter failure and despair. =++

Churches can love their members by providing a discipleship
training program that teaches biblical principles for living
the Christian life, and by providing a helper to walk
alongside them (see "Counseling the New Believer" in the Q&A Counseling Articles index).=++

Churches can love their members by providing a counseling
pastor who is as faithful to the Word, and who is as
knowledgeable of the Word, as is the senior pastor--a helper
who can provide biblical counseling for those who are failing
in their Christian walk. =++

Love them enough to help them be successful in their Christian
walk, love them enough to restore them when they fall. This is
Christ-like unconditional love. =++

Copyright 1988 by Wendell E. Miller=+
Downloaded from http://www.biblical-counsel.org=++

May be reprinted and distributed in quantities if distributed
free or at cost, and if=+
copyright, download, and permission information is included.=+
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